by Anneliese Hucal

My biggest sexual fantasy (this week) involves a hot naked man and cupcakes. Flavor doesn’t particularly matter, but I want someone to naked-bake with me. Amidst all that sticky frosted glory, I want to have great kitchen counter sex or even a really hot floor make out sesh. Food can be a big aphrodisiac, especially when it’s something that makes your body taste like a sweet wonderland. I’ve never really believed in the oyster thing, but eating small pieces of fruit off of another person’s body has always been a big favorite of mine. Tasting a mixture of myself and some hot sugary lust is probably the best part of slowly moving my warm mouth up the dripping ice cream trail on someone’s body.

Last week, I was a panelist for the Sex in the Dark event, and one of the most interesting questions that I was asked was about habits that affect sex life. As it turns out, there are many habits that can hurt your sex drive or make your sexual experience a weird one, not just the food you eat.


It’s a well-known fact that some foods can cause unusual aromas or flavors to come out of your pores after eating them. Think about this next time you go to Taco Bell before hitting up your girlfriend for a quick beejay. This is not the only problematic food on the spectrum. According to, men who eat too much canned food can have inhibited male sex hormones caused by a material that commonly lines cans, bisphenol-A (BPA), so cut out those SpaghettiO’s.

Caffeine (although not a food) can kill sex drive too, by causing decreased blood flow due to its vascular constricting properties. Drinking more water and healthy fruit juices can counteract those effects when cutting it out entirely isn’t an option. A Mediterranean diet (think gyros, paella or Greek yogurt cheesecake) is a good suggestion because it combines healthy fruits and vegetables with other foods that are high in omega-3 fatty acids. I can’t promise anything, but I can say that I have always had a higher sex drive than most, and I have always eaten this way.


My old friend with benefits insisted on having the TV on during sex. Partially because when I’m enjoying myself, I’m a little loud. Another part of it was because one time, while we were watching “Black Snake Moan” on Netflix, the music turned me on to a whole new level. While it was fun on occasion, having too much TV ruined the mood; especially when it auto-changed to “The Hills Have Eyes.” When we start bringing our computers and TVs into the bedroom, it is easy to become distracted from what is most important. While it can also be fun to find sexual inspiration online, having the blare of the screen can prove to be quite unhealthy.


I had a friend tell me a story about how her boyfriend went through a phase when he smoked a lot. She told me that it started to make his man meat taste like filthy bong water, and that sounded a bit rank to me. We all know someone who socially smokes at bars and parties. Whether it is because it’s a good excuse to go outside and get away, out of stress or because you have an oral fixation like I do, smoking is dangerous to your sex life. Alcohol is also dangerous, not only because it limits one’s ability to consent, but it also serves as a depressant. Besides running the risk of sleepy time during sex, guys may also encounter the dreaded “whiskey dick.”


In high school, the jocks got laid. While we thought it was because of muscles and popularity, I think that deep down we knew that people who exercise do it better. It’s a well-known fact that regular exercise can help anyone improve his or her cardiovascular health. Sex hormones are boosted by a workout, and the endorphins also help one feel better and improve body image. I suggest yoga or wrestling. They are the two most bendy sexual sports, and getting hot and sweaty on the floor is a skill you may need if you sleep with someone like me.

Cut out the bad habits and start making a bigger effort to get inspired. Your dirty bits will thank you for the change in lifestyle. And every once in while, treat yo’ self to some delicious taco truck, but not before sex! You deserve it, you sexy beast.

Anneliese Hucal studies public relations and prelaw. She can be reached at opinion@